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Wet Noodle Posse | Blog

Monday, July 28, 2008

What If You Aren’t Going to the Conference?

Earlier this month I suggested that our readers attending the RWA conference get their heads in the game. But not all of our readers are heading to San Francisco. Some can’t afford to go or have other obligations that prevent them from attending. Several posse members, yours truly included, will not be there this year. I have an assignment for those of you in a blue funk over not going. You must pick at least one item in the list that follows and perform it to your best ability, then share with us how it worked to lift your spirits.

1. Wallow in a pint of your favorite full fat ice cream. If you’re really depressed, go for the half gallon. High wallow factor flavors include Mayfield Moose Tracks, Starbucks’ Coffee Almond Fudge, and Godiva White Chocolate Raspberry.

2. Type up queries to the editors or agents you won’t be having an appointment with, affix stamps and mail or e-mail them. Be proactive. Turn your lemons into the proverbial lemonade—or better yet, your limes into mojitos.

3. Create a “DC or Bust” sign for the refrigerator, bathroom mirror, and car dashboard to remind you to start saving money for next year’s conference now.

4. Whine to your husband, best friend, and/or children as often as possible. You might as well spread the misery; it’s cathartic.

5. Throw yourself a romance pity party, I mean film fest. Pop some popcorn; Charge yourself $5 for a coke. Throw juju fruits at your husband.

6. See that stack of books in your “to be read” leaning tower of Pisa? Spread the books on the floor, blindfold yourself with a scarf and pick one. Read it.

7. Channel your favorite heroine. Well, fiddle dee dee, why not? Baffle your friends, family, and the people you work with.

8. Use the conference program supplement included in your Romance Writers’ Report to determine which taped sessions you might want to hear. Purchase a few or get the whole conference all on a two CD-ROM set for a bargain price.

9. Put your favorite “poor pitiful me” song on the CD player and belt it out at the top of your lungs even if you’re tone deaf and the neighbor’s dog starts howling. Suggested song choices: “All by Myself” or “I Don’t Care Anymore.”

10. Write a limerick about your best friend who’s going to the conference without you, the rat. “There was a romance writer named Belle, who left her critique partner in hell…”

In all seriousness, I wish every WNP reader who wanted to attend the conference could. If none of the above suggestions strikes your fancy, work on your novel this last week of July. Even better, finish it, and share that good news with all the posse readers.


At 9:29 AM, Blogger Esri Rose said...

I have another suggestion. Ask your conference-going friends to keep track of which agents and editors say, "You're all welcome to send me something marked 'requested material'" in a panel or workshop. While we're still complaining about our feet, you can be putting partials together. Mail them to the appropriate people the day after conference ends, and get a jump on the rest.

It's not where you go, it's who you know.

At 10:31 AM, Blogger Sarah said...

Find the "left behind" workshops!

At 11:24 AM, Blogger Terry Stone said...

Great suggestions! Many of them sound vaguely familiar. Hmm, I'm wondering if you didn't get this list from my summer-bored teens. LOL.

I would have to suggest that you add Hagen-Daas' Dulce de Leche ice cream to your list. The carbs in it are astronomically high but it's my self indulgent ice cream of choice.

And I love Esri's suggestion. Louisa? I know you'll be here later, take note. ;0)

At 12:15 PM, Blogger Louisa Cornell said...

Got it, Terry Jo! Will do! Get that partial of that fabulous western historical romance ready to go!

Next year all my critique buddies will be in DC, right Terry Jo?

Now I feel really guilty about going. Not enough to cancel the trip, but guilty! I am SO lucky. The fairy godmothers of RWA gave me a scholarship for my registration fee. All kinds of people - the people on this blog, the Divine Ms. Gaston, Terry Jo and my other CPs all helped me to make this amazing trip!!

At 12:46 PM, Blogger Gillian Layne said...

May I add the Romance Diva's site? They are hosting a "Not going to conference Conference"

That ice cream sounds divine, Terry Jo! :)

No guilt, Louisa! Just go and have a ball! ;)

At 3:34 PM, Blogger Mo H said...

It's great to have friends keep track of who's requesting what and letting you know. Thanks for adding that suggestion!

At 3:38 PM, Blogger Mo H said...

Thanks, Sarah and Gillian for suggesting the links to the left behind and romance divas workshops!

At 3:40 PM, Blogger Mo H said...

I'll have to try your dulce de leche!

At 3:41 PM, Blogger Mo H said...

Don't feel guilty. You've worked hard to get to the conference. Enjoy every minute!

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At 4:11 PM, Blogger Lily said...

It must be great for readers to attend too!


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